Gigantic Disclaimer : statements below are not based on any sort of factual scientific method; therefore most all claims are a general biased stereotypical rant from one's own mind and should be taken as a humorous read and not an educational one.
Kinda wish you knew the ridiculousness of effort it took to take this "post themed" photo of myself.
It would have literally made you lol.
Facts:
- Non-morning people enviously admire morning people. They wish that they could have that vigour and ambition in the morning.
- Non-morning people can and will get up early regularly if they are obligated to (as in - others are depending on them to get up early)...Though that still doesn't mean that they enjoy it. I've had a good 24ish years of consistently waking up between 7-7:30am most everyday of the week... and yet I'm still a non-morning person.
- Non-morning people are as good of parents as morning people parents. My daughter wakes up generally between 9-11am so I'm kinda living the dream life right now, BUT if that changes I will of course wake up earlier with her.
- Non-morning people are really pretty... but this is especially true in the late afternoon/evenings.
- Non-morning people are very humble. They never boast about being a non-morning person, and even if they appear to be a morning person, they feel a deep sense of being dishonest and allow others to know the truth that they are in fact not morning people. They would hate it if a morning person felt bad for waking them up. They feel huge guilt over anyone having to be put out by their vice.
- Non-morning people have the strong-willed urge to stay up late. This is when their creative genius seems to come out and/or their senses of humour.
- Non-morning people have a better sleep than morning people. In fact, it's so good that that is why they cling to holding to it as long as possible. We're just better at sleeping than your average Joe.
- Non-morning people are not vain. They will always choose sleep over personal beauty/style.
- Non-morning people generally don't like to nap. They don't usually feel the urge to because they know they'll get a wonderful night sleep as they usually do and can wait it out till nightfall. Plus they wake up from naps badly because it's like a mock morning that's not even real - it messes with our minds and we lash out helplessly after getting up from said nap.
- Non-morning people eat less calories. Probably because on the days when there is no obligation to wake up early, breakfast replaces lunch... meal skippage.
- Non-morning people do try to put on a happy face in the morning, but if you're an adult and they feel super comfortable around you, they won't try at all.
- Non-morning people are overall very happy and successful in life, seeing as they most always get an adequate sleep that helps fuel them.
Myths:
- Non-morning people despise morning people.
- If non-morning people form a habit of getting up early for a long period of time they would become morning people.
- Non-morning people don't sleep well through the night so they compensate in the morning.
- Non-morning people are lazy.
- Non-morning people are depressive.
- Non-morning people are messy.
- Non-morning people have no ambition.
- Non-morning people are scary/mean in the mornings.
- Non-morning people sleep in coffins.
- Non-morning people are selfish.
- Non-morning people are non-successful in life.
- Non-morning people aren't very good parents.
Basically what you really need to know is that non-morning people are just like morning people except we have way better sleeps that make it hard to want to get up from. We can and we will get up, we just don't like it. Also, never feel bad for waking us up cause we'd hate that you were put out in any way by this; we harbour a lot of guilt from having a way better sleep life than you!
Heaven's slice is sleep.
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