The Two-Year-Old Conclusion

Now that I have a 3 year old, I feel I have full license to publish my thoughts on the "terrible two" stage.

First, they are NOT terrible. They are fun. So fun. They are just hilarious in their every venture. They walk and talk like they know everything and do so with full intent of action regardless of the firm mention of "No." It's incredibly entertaining and just a joy to have a two year old. Truly. It is.

It's just may be a little hard though on us parents because... Well... You can't go anywhere.

They get into everything, hit everyone, and run. Boy do they run. Fast.

Honestly, if I had no obligations to go to any functions or social gatherings, it would probably be the best stage EVER. I could let her roam freely and get into everything. It would be so fun, exciting, even crazy enjoyable as a parent. I mean I'd follow closely for safety purposes, but it would be easy peasy.

But alas, you have to still carry them out into the world. Groceries. Other peoples' houses. Appointments. Whatever else.  So, you have to teach them, the smaller version of yourself that wants to have more authority than you. And they will fight you daily for the illusive captain's chair you are desperately trying to keep your rear on.

But still. It's fun. So fun.

Three's chalking up to be a pretty fun year as well...

Heaven's slice is being blessed to have a two year old child in your charge.

I thought I was heavy.

I can still remember it quite vividly - the sudden jolting rumble of the texas gate against the tires that woke me from a dream-filled slumber. We were home and I was oh so tired. The dimly lit moon and stars stared at me through the window as I shut my unbelieving eyes. May be we wouldn't be home, may be we had a little farther to drive, may be I could stay sleeping, may be... the second texas gate hit. Yep, we were definitely home. The thought of having to drop out from the car door and walk into the house, take my shoes off and walk again to my room had me silently angrily irritated. But alas, I had my parents...a knowingly selfish decision was made. I shall pretend to be still sleeping, so my parents will have to carry me. They will take off my shoes and lay me ever-so gently into my bed stripping me of my coat. I thought I was heavy to carry, and I felt kinda bad to be doing this... but a sleepy mind is a selfish one. I was doing it. They opened the door and whispered my name. I did not move. They gently unbuckled and slipped me out in a koala bear embrace. My shoes were taken off, my coat too, and I was placed in my comfortingly familiar bed.

I thought I was heavy... and then I had children of my own.

Carrying a sleeping child into their bed from the car envokes the most tenderest of feelings. It's indescribable. They are dead weight in your arms, yet they are anything but heavy. They are absolutely beautiful; their fluttering eyelids and deep slow breaths about take yours away. You get to pretend even for a moment that they are your baby again and it's just... heaven.



Heaven's slice is carrying a sleeping child to bed.

Forever in Pretend Land

We've all heard the countless quotes that have gone around about being 'Just a mom' and how that really means 'you are a waitress, teacher, photographer, psychologist, secretary, hairdresser, maid, chauffeur, nurse, referee... etc. etc.' And all that is true, but I feel like these quotes are missing a key phrase before the endless list of professions: 'I get to be.'

Playing pretend in my own little secluded world growing up, was my go to favourite pastime. It was such a big part of my life that lets just say I still did this long after my peers stopped (thank goodness I grew up in a very physically remote location). I loved LOVE playing pretend! And now, being so privileged to be a stay at home mommy, I get to pretend to do pretty well every profession one can think of! I'm a ballerina, country singer, bus driver, fashion stylist, accountant, detective, speech therapist, counsellor,  plus I have my very own cooking show. The list could go on and on ( I also pretend to be a blogger on the side;). Who else could carry on this many roles in a single day? Seriously, this gig rocks. True, it isn't really paid in money...but with all the giggles, gurgles, cuddles, snuggles and kisses from kidlets, it definitely makes up for all the missing dollar signs.

It's funny how when you're a kid you list a ton of things you want to be when you grow up, and as you age you finally realize that that all could've been said by saying just one profession: parent.

Heaven's slice is playing pretend even in adulthood!

The HARDEST part of Parenting

(In the "littles" phase anyways...)

It's not the tantrums, it's not the colds, it's not the messes, it's not the lack of sleep, and no, it's not losing the precious "me" time.

The hardest part of parenting is feeling the judgment of others. 

Whether it's from a close family member or some dude in the cereal isle, it's hard to ignore the deep anxiety that ensues within when your child has a hard time in front of others. You're scared that they think you are an unfit or inadequate parent, but what's even harder is feeling like someone is judging your child; that they're bad mannered, or something is wrong with them. It's just the worst feeling, and as much as I'd love to say it's all in one's own mind thinking they're judging us when they aren't, let's be honest - they are. I've done it, especially before having my own kidlets. You've done it too I'm sure. From Facebook post sharing of self-righteous parenting do's and do not's, from a blogpost pin on Pinterest, from swimming pools to the public playground; We judge. We judge, and it's AWFUL that we do this. Unless there is some serious red flags regarding abuse that need reporting or a direct involvement with your child, we have no right to pridefully disapprove someone's parenting of their own young.

I'm not saying this is the only only reason, for there are many, why I'm somewhat of a hermit - shutting myself in with my kids, but... it's definitely one of the reasons. Staying in my own home away from public is just so much more empowering for me as a mother to raise, teach, and love my darlings the way I feel is best. I feel completely secure in how I'm helping them grow when I'm away from the judgement or perceived judgment from others.

Sometimes I think people genuinely feel that by giving advice without being asked it is doing a parent a kindness. However, I feel that parents are a lot more assertive than people give credit and if they are struggling and want advice, they will most definitely ask for it first.


Oh, and also putting jeans on a squirmy baby, that's pretty hard too... it may be a tie for that one.

Heaven's slice is training yourself to stop judging other parents and finding ways to not care about what others think of our own parenting.

Love your babies.

As I interviewed my Grandma, I relayed the next question on my sheet, "What do you love the most about parenting?" Her answer: "My babies." This statement effortlessly fumbled out of her mouth quicker than any other questions I asked. I held it together as I swallowed the lump in my throat, averting the scene I was about to create.

This incident was many weeks ago, yet the thought of it still haunts my heart. That gleam on her beautifully familiar face gave way to the great genuinity of her answer. Her babies. She loved her babies. This woman bore 8 children with birthdays ranging from 26 months apart to just shy of 12 months apart. This woman had to wash cloth diapers by hand with hauled water whilst carefully managing the preparations of cows milk for her babe's feeding supplement because she wasn't able to nurse. And yet, this woman still looks back on the years she held those little bundles as her favourite cherished moments.

The words love your babies keeps whispering to me as I stare at my baby boy.

There are too many harsh commentaries from today's exhausted mother. Too many rants about how hard it is. Too many platforms encouraging negative dialogue about how babies make life difficult.
It's 1 year, really. 1 year. You have a baby 1 year. 1 year you will never have again. You'll get a toddler for 2-3 years, a child 5-6 years, teenager 6 years, an adult, well, forever. BUT, you will never have that baby again. How precious, and sadly fleeting, a phase is the baby.

You only get 1 year. Make the most of it. It's true, they won't remember the rockabyes, the peekaboo's, the snuggles, the late nights, the early mornings, the messes, the giggles, the kisses, but YOU will. Even 60-70 years down the road, you will still remember.

Enjoy their little fingers and toes that grab, kick, and flutter. Enjoy those soft squishy cheeks and the sound of their breath and cries that settle into your ear. Enjoy those most innocent piercing eyes that seem to peer inside your soul. Enjoy this precious fleeting phase and love your babies.

Heaven's slice is loving her baby.

Annoyances

that I secretly kinda love:


A cry in the middle of the night from one of my children. The reason why is because when it initially happens I have to guess which child it's coming from and I just get really giddy anxiously anticipating the next squirm to reveal the true culprit. It's oddly satisfying to be unsure which one of my children is calling out for some love. May be because it enforces the realization of the blessing that I have not only 1, but 2 children!  How lucky am I?!!!

Grocery shopping. It's like a 4-5 hour event with my littles, and I always go in with the intention of not having to go back for a month (never happens) due to my frugal nature, but I always enjoy the day that comes out of it. I get my baby close and my toddler to teach and have fun with. I went grocery shopping solo for the first time in a million years (k, may be only a couple) and though it was super quick and efficient, it wasn't very joyful. I cherish the conversations I get to have with my little ones staring back at me in the shopping cart; it's just a fun day.

Filling up with gas. I really don't know why this is, may be because as a teenager the local gas station was where all the socializing and cool kids were at so I still feel oober cool being there... or may be probably it's the prospect of a coke slurpee... Either way, I really like it.

The end of a cold. Let me be clear - I HATE COLDS an insane amount. When my throat hurts it's like possibly the worst psychological turmoil I can handle without divine intervention. That being said, you know the tail end of a cold where your throat is perfectly fine and wonderful and your nose is only somewhat runny? There's this brief period where your face feels like a permanent post sneeze just occurred and it feels FANTASTIC.

Toys in my bedroom. When I stumble upon some toy in my bedroom at the end of the day after the kids are asleep it's like they carved their name yet again onto another side of my heart declaring:"I was here."

A teething baby. My boy is in this stage and oh how I'm adoring it! He's a little more clingy, unhappy, drooly, and wants to eat a lot more, but there's these particular precious moments that I just love. I love the "NOM NOM" part of teething! When I go to hold or kiss him and he aggressively goes to bite me with his drooly gums on anything he can get a hold of, it just puts a big ol' smile on my face. In particular, I love it when he goes straight in for my cheek. I can't explain it, I just adore it!




Heaven's slice is seeing the rose amongst the thorns.

Screens Suck

Firstly, PLEASE be restfully assured that this post is completely hypocritical, and that I the author am fully aware of it.

Having said that, what I will go on to write I really do believe... I just usually try to put that belief in a headlock on the daily so I can scroll through my newsfeed in peace.

Anyways.

Screens suck. They literally do. They suck the energy out of ambition, they suck empathy out emotion, they suck time away from relationships, and they suck the living out of your life. They suck you in like you are the addict and they are the answer. And they're not, they're really really not. Yet it's so hard to stop! To stop scrolling, clicking, liking, commenting, watching, reading, sharing, typing, posting; it is just so hard! There's always something new that pops up - a big news story, a crusade to defend, a tangent to exploit, a video to lol at, photos to gawk at... It's all so enticing! But it's not real.

It's not real.

That photo album you're swiping through of a past acquaintance was taken a month ago at a lake you've never been.
That video you're watching was taken a few years back on a whole other continent than you reside.
That news story you're reading was completely made up purely to get you to visit their website.
That little girl will not get a heart transplant if she gets a million likes.
You will not be the lucky winner of $1000 given by a recent lotto winner.
You're crush will not reveal himself once you share a post...

None of it is your reality.

You know what's real? This:

















(Having trouble viewing? Look up about 10 inches and it should work.)

This, this is real. Isn't it glorious?!



Too many times I've gotten a tug, or a yell, or a swat that reminds me that the screen isn't real. Too many times I've spent my time scrolling through looking at photos of other children instead of looking at my own right in front of me. Too many times, and I realize I'm seriously addicted to a screen, a stupid iPad screen. I feel so much energy and motivation when I'm out of it's clutches. I'm more patient of a mother, I'm more kind, more happy, and way more fun. When my battery power dies and it's plugged in in the back room for hours unnoticed I feel so much more solidarity and peace in my home and in my heart, and I know my children feel it too. My focus is on them and not on a screen.

It's not to say there isn't a lot of good that can come from the internet, but it can be a hard habit to break when we use it in a way that gets us out of our real life and into a false reality that's so mind distractingly consuming. This technology that is at our finger tips should be used to enhance the reality we are in, but not take us out of it. (Things like dancing around the house to music off of youtube or looking at the recipe from which you are making supper, etc.)




Heaven's slice is knowing when you are an addict... and doing something about it!

PS click here to view some addiction videos that are pretty insightful "12 steps to Change"- CAUTION they deal with mature subject matter.

The Luckiest Kids

For Family Home Evening we recently went over this particular Ensign article below. Needless to say, I absolutely loved it! Definitely a must read, so click below and read it will ya?!!


Blessing Our Children by Improving Our Marriages - Lori Cluff Schade


"The quality of your marriage is influencing your children, whether you realize it or not. As you and your spouse work to improve your relationship, your children will be blessed." 
                                                                 - Lori Cluff Schade

I've always thought that children that know their mom and dad love each other were among the most luckiest kids ever, but this article truly drives the blessing it provides for the children to a hole in one! It also has a lot of great ideas on how to improve your marriage from whatever scale you think your marriage is at - Here they are below, but they explain them more in depth in the article... just read it K?!

• "Articulate and share what you want your marriage to look like in 5, 10, or 20 years. 
• Write down and share a positive memory in the marriage.
• Share a memory of a time that you were able to overcome a challenge together. 
• Create small but meaningful rituals for when you part and come together again. 
• Introduce an element of novelty into your dating. 
• Tell your children regularly what you admire about your spouse. 
• Actively seek uplifting marital improvement resources. 
• Ask each other regularly if you are more or less connected as a couple than before and discuss what you can to do bridge the gap. 
• Counsel with your bishop to access professional resources if necessary. 
• Pray. "            

        - Lori Cluff Schade

Pretty sure my kids are the luckiest kids. Not because we go galavanting all the time doing crazy fun things, not because they get all the candy they want when they want, not because they get every toy they have eyes for, not because they have no bedtime and can watch whatever they want (because none of that is true for one)... but because their parents are pretty smitten with each other.

(too steamy?)

I heart us :)

Heaven's slice is giving children the best life they can have.

Cutting People Slack

Before I had my own kidlets I remember feeling like an outcast from other mothers. I or they would strike up a conversation and it would very quickly go to how many kids you had and once I'd say none, the conversation would end. I was quickly dropped to them in conversation because I wasn't a mother like them. Apparently I wasn't good enough or interesting enough to get to know because I was childless...

Then after I had my first child and now with my second, I completely understand. After you have a child, quoting Smashmouth's wise words, "your head gets smart, but your brain gets dumb." Your brain changes immensely after having a child, your wiring for taking care of your child and constantly asking "where's my baby, how's my baby?!" (see 'Mommy Brain') overrides everything else, up to and especially your adult speaking skills. My brain has to work so very very hard to retain information others have given me and spit out a sentence not only properly but appropriately. Holy cow it's weird how hard it is to have conversations; to start them, to continue them, to finish them, it's all just very exhausting to figure out how it once worked. You have to start at square one it seems with developing your social skills. When someone does also have children though it is easier to converse, simply because your brain and life is already deep in the thick of everything about your kids, so vocalizing becomes a lot easier. I'm intimidated now by others who don't have kids because they can speak with such ease, genuine concern, and tactfulness. I don't have those skills even close as strong anymore. To remember enough about a person to strike up a conversation and ask about certain things in their life that they've already made mention to me previously, takes a lot of digging deep into my mind to find. Meanwhile if I am succeeding in really listening to someone and conversing with them, guaranteed my children are being completely neglected because I am no multitasker when it domes to human interactions. Hopefully they haven't ran away in the time it took me to partake of a simple weather conversation with a stranger passing by at the park.

I'm not saying all mothers, especially in baby phases, are handicapped in their social awkwardness, but I (with great hope) can't be the only one who has a hard time. I've said things that don't make sense and came off rude I'm sure. I will just put out a blanketed apology, as I will butcher it if I say it in person, to anyone that has ever felt like they weren't interesting enough because they didn't have a child, that is simply not the case. I'm coming out of my brain mushiness more and more after having my second kidlet, but it truly has taken a lot of effort to get my social skills up to par. One thing you must always remember is you are awesome even to the wordless parent, I mean "hey now, you're a rockstar!"

So my hope is for someone reading this who has felt as I did before I had children to please cut those mothers slack; I so wish I did. Those poor exhausted awesome happily content wonderful parents that I mistook as rude were actually just more focused on the raising of their babies and saving brain energy to better parent. It was never that I wasn't good enough.

Furthermore it is an ever evolving lesson to myself that generally speaking people don't mean to be mean, and if they are coming off as such, there's probably reason enough to give them the needed benefit of the doubt.



Heaven's slice is cutting people slack.

Winning MVP

Parenting/mothering your children is like a sport: There is always an opposing side to be fought aggressively for the win. Plays made are in both offence and defense form. Sometimes you have team mates, but majority of times you're in it alone. Not only is there physical stamina needed but mental, emotional, and spiritual endurance as it's game on 24/7. And instead of a cheering crowd, it's mostly critics, who are only able to see a spec of a glimpse of your parenting to further their judgments.


But one of the best things about this sport is that every day without fail you get awarded as the MVP, because to your kids you're always the MVP. Whether you're succeeding or in the struggles, the trophy is yours, and though you don't always feel like you deserve your MVP award at the end of the day, you are still the most-valued-player in their lives. It's not their soccer coach, english teacher, band instructor, nursery leader, their friend down the street, and no, it's not even grandma (gasp!); it's you! It's a lot of pressure and a whole lot of work being a parent, but I don't know of any actual sport that could come anywhere close to the satisfaction that comes from knowing what an important part  you play in someone's lives. I've never felt so needed, so vital in someone's life. Having a new baby just reminds you of how so very essential you are.




The parenting phase of having littles kind of forces you to put some personal activities you previously enjoyed onto the back burner, but given the immense sense of belonging, importance, significance, and necessity in being you feel  it truly isn't a sacrifice. (I haven't rode a horse in almost a year and do you think I've lost any sleep over it? Definetly have NOT.)

I want to earn it. I want to earn that MVP award at the end of the day. When my head hits that pillow my hope is always that my children have felt loved and were taught how to succeed, to improve, but most importantly to love others. The participation award is key to knowing you've earned your MVP title that day; really participating and being fully present in the presence of your children.

"The service that counts most is usually recognized by God alone." 

                                                                     - elder Michael T. Ringwood.

Heaven's slice is giving something up in cause for something greater and earning your MVP trophy.

Kids

It's funny how one word added into your regular vocabulary can make such a difference. Being able to use the term "kids" now is soooo cool! I'm just living on cloud 9 :)

Heaven's slice is kids.

He didn't have to

Looking back on my childhood in what I remember most about my Dad is that he seemed to always take me with him. Whether it was up in the big valley field to check cows, to my uncle's shop to weld, up in the field swathing, baling, to rodeos, picking up the mail, fixing fence, going to town to pick up parts...whatever it was he was doing he'd always come get me to go with him. I'm sure I slowed him down, but yet he NEVER made me feel like I did. Somehow he made me feel like I was being a big help, even if I was wondering off catching grasshoppers.



He didn't have to take me, but he did, and that's one of the things that makes him the best Dad I could ever dream of having. He loved me enough to make me a part of his world and feel wanted.

You know how they say "girls tend to marry their fathers"? 

Well let's just say it's a good thing I'm pretty fond of my Dad...

And how could I not talk about my own darling of a husband when it comes to Father's Day. Could not have picked a better Daddy for our kids. I definelty lucked out!! He's soooo loving to them and so involved in everything that has to do with them. He never shies aways from taking them with him, even our two year old (who is a  flight risk) into town solo. He's one of the biggest reasons I'm so comfortable and happy being a Mommy, because I've got him as a co-worker.


And... can I just say that there is nothing more attractive than seeing your husband fulfill his Daddy role so perfectly?

Dang he's hot.

Heaven's slice is Fathers.

Mother's Day

To the women who raised us.

To the women who have suffered longing or loss.

To the women who carried and bore us.

To the women who cheer us on in all the noble endeavours we try to pursue.

To the women who hug us and rub our backs as we fight the tears.

To the women who selflessly gave us to a better home that otherwise couldn't be provided.

To the women who who provide extra care and guidance to our children.

To the women who embrace and cultivate their own unique talents for the benefit of others.

To the women who listen ever-so deliberately and delicately to the woes of our heart.

To the women we so admire.

Mother's Day is about every woman.

Happy Mother's Day Y'all!

Heaven's slice is taking time to enjoy your Mother's Day.

Insecure Momma Drama

Over the past few months I've noticed several links to articles bashing what other parents have done for their kids and vocalizing why their way is right. As I've read these posts, all I really get from them is that the author is obviously insecure about how they parent - They felt the need to quickly go public with specifics on how someone else is parenting/living different than them so they must be wrong. Good parents inspire others to find their own way and encourage them, not throw out fact after fact and advice after advice from their own prideful (insecure) brain.

Being different isn't wrong.
Just because Barbara Liv Sally likes to let her children make tons of messes doing crafts and experiments, doesn't mean that Becky Lou Sue is a bad parent for trying to maintain a clutter free home with having her kids clean up throughout the day. Just because Jill Fan Gladys decorates elaborate gorgeous cakes for her children's birthdays doesn't mean Jane Franny Glory is a bad parent for writing a long birthday letter every year for that child storing it for their big 18th birthday gift. Just because Peggy Tate Joe cooks quick simple meals doesn't mean that Precious Tori Jane is a bad parent for spending hours in the kitchen cooking gourmet elaborate meals. Just because Lucy Doll Terry makes her kids go puddle jumping in whatever clothes they're in doesn't mean Louise Day Tom is a bad parent because she makes sure her kids are in nice clean clothes and has them keep it that way.
(I should have been an official cabbage patch doll namer)

Pinterest is NOT out to get you.

If you are getting offended at seeing prettified images of people and things pertaining to parenting and entertainment with their kids, you need to take a pro-longed vacation from the inter-web. All pinterest is is ideas; ideas to take or leave, pin or scroll down, to use/copy or ignore. 

When you're a happy parent, you're the BEST parent. 

A parent that's stressed and overwhelmed makes their kids also feel stressed and overwhelmed. Hence a parent that is happy also has happy kids (of course it's ok not to be happy at times). The key to being a happy parent is finding out more about yourself, digging deep into what your stresses are and what your enjoyment is; simply incorporating more of your enjoyments and avoiding your stresses.  As a parent you must always provide for your children's basic needs (obviously) but as for the rest it's what you as the parent opt in for. Some people get stressed having a messy house while others get stressed having to commit to the time and energy to clean their house. Some people have a love of baking for others while others have a love of just listening to others. Some people love to be social and involved in a ton of committees, while others feel stressed in social situations and the responsibilities that incur with committees. Whatever you like to do, whatever you're passionate about, take pride in, talented with, whatever makes you happy... DO IT! And incorporate your kids with whatever that is! Sure, it's gonna take 5 times longer, but if it's something you actually enjoy doing then the time won't matter, in fact it'll be fun! You'll have a smile on and so will they.

No parent is the same, and we need to quit taking in all this advice stating parents have to be so rigidly cloned, right down to the phrases we say to our children. It's not reality, nor should it ever be. Every person is different - so too obviously is every child and parent.

I stand by what I said in my PUTTING YOUR CHILDREN IN BOXES post:

"...teach your children they are loved and show them to love. There are many ways a child can be reared, but there is one founding principle it always needs to come back to and that is love." -me

"This child came to you, therefore Heavenly Father matched your specific and individual wonderful gifts, talents, and personality to nurture this precious gift. Prayerfully raising your child with love WILL be enough" -me




I still love this quote too:

"As a mother you have been given divine instincts to help you sense your child's special talents and unique capacities." - Elder Richard G. Scott The Eternal Blessings of Marriage

Your kids are just that - YOUR KIDS. Focus on your family, not the family down the street (unless there's some serious red flags going on that need to be reported ...  obviously)

I'm very opinionated when it comes to parenting my own child, but that's because I know I'm the expert on my own child, as are you to yours. Individual opinions really only solicit the need for talk with one's spouse in how you both wish to raise your kidlets.



Heaven's slice is being a happy and secure parent.

Transitions

Kids grow up too fast 

It's a total cliche I know, but that's because it's so craze balls true!

The sleeping chambers tugs at my heart the most every time it changes:

From bassinet

to crib,

to the lowest setting of the crib 

(for some reason this switch gave me the most tears),

to a bed bed?!

I am comforted though due to a simply wonderful quote that totally applies.

"There are no true endings, only everlasting beginnings"

                                                                                                                                                                -Dieter F. Uchtdorf (Grateful in Any Circumstances)

I've started to now get ever-so excited with every milestone we're presently hitting with my little girl.

Heaven's slice is maturing.

9 Reasons I knew I would be a Mother

I'm gonna shake things up and give you the "last but not least" reason first. 

1.  I was born a woman.
I so wish I read this talk prior to having my little one: (Click to read it-->) Are We Not All Mothers? by Sheri L. Dew. It is the #1 reason I knew I would be a mother. Here are some of my favourite quotes from the talk:

"Of all the words they could have chosen to define her role and her essence, both God the Father and Adam called Eve “the mother of all living” —and they did so before she ever bore a child." 

 ^"Motherhood is more than bearing children, though it is certainly that. It is the essence of who we are as women. It defines our very identity, our divine stature and nature, and the unique traits our Father gave us."

"As daughters of our Heavenly Father, and as daughters of Eve, we are all mothers and we have always been mothers. And we each have the responsibility to love and help lead the rising generation." 

2. I enjoy listening to the same song over and over again.
I should clarify - If I really disliked the song when I originally heard it then I will NOT enjoy listing to it over and over again. When I discovered the repeat button on my first stereo I was hooked. You know who else loves hearing songs over and over again??? Kidlets!!!

3. I love to cheer and applaud.

And I get to do it throughout the day now with my toddler! It doesn't even matter what I'm cheering over, I just love clapping and giving praise no matter what. This one time I got really into a hockey game in cheering the team on. I leaned over to my husband and said, "Huh, we must be sitting with the 'away-team' fans eh?" To which he replied, "Nope." To be fair, we were in the nose bleed seating and their jerseys were pretty well the same colour... don't worry it's not like it was an NHL team; I just love cheering!

4. I love teaching. 
Not enough to have become a school teacher obviously, but I love helping someone achieve that "I actually understand now!" moment. How awesome is it in my current phase of life to get to teach things that I already know so well: colours, ABC's, names of things, animal noises, etc. Getting to teach these simple things is so stinkin fun!!

5. I'm an avid self-discoverer. 
I love finding out new things about me; what I enjoy doing and am good at, so I can focus on those things I already possess to benefit others(especially my kidlets). I can focus better on being the mommy I want to be and am, instead of jealousing over the mommy someone else is. 'Mommy guilt' isn't really something I get much of (it's ok, you can hate me...) and I think it's really because I don't compare.

6. I'm good at simplifying and staying non-busy.
I can better roll with the punches and unexpected twists and turns of motherhood because I don't make many plans or schedule much anyways. I do things on priority levels and I can easily cast off things that don't make the cut. This diffuses a lot of moments where I could be angry or resentful at the things I wanted to accomplish but couldn't because my toddler wanted/needed something entirely different. People trump things and that is that, so why pre-occupy myself with a long list of busy things to do?

7. I'm not only fine, but very comfortable being a hermit.
Honestly, if I get social interaction from even just 1 close friend once a month and it's in a grocery store, I'm good for the next 30+ days. I'm fine with kicking it at home with my kidlet and hubby 24/7, in fact it's kinda my fave.  I feel like most women desperately want that time away... but I'm weird and can do without it for very long periods of time without getting cranky.

8. I love reading children's books.
The pictures, the colours, the short paragraphs, the simple easily-understood wording, it's all just wonderful! When I'm in an in between phase of not having little ones at home or having grankids, I might just keep on buying and reading children's books. Don't be alarmed if you see me at an elementary school book fair childless...

9. I love snuggles. 
I just love it so much when my little girl wants me to hold her and snuggles on me; my heart melts and my worries cease.

Heaven's slice is knowing who you are.

Little Stuff

I love it when...

My husband and I drive together anywhere. No phones, no distractions, nothing but time for some good visits to catch our lives up in its' entirety.

My daughter rushes to 'set up camp' wherever I go. Her blanket, bottle, book, and shopping bag of toys gets toted into the kitchen, my bedroom, on the couch, her bedroom, the office, etc. on a daily basis. 

I get to have a good long hot shower. (except when I'm preggers it has to be a shorter one cause I will faint)

My busy toddler runs up and gives me an aggressive long hug to my legs.

I find little kissy lip prints on my bedroom mirror about 2-3 feet high.

Heaven's slice is in the little stuff.

The Newborn: How I Survived As A Mommy

Every circumstance, person, and child is unique, so rest assured I am NOT putting this out there saying 'this is what you must do.' I've just been reflecting lately on how I got through my first baby in that precious life-changing newborn stage as a first time Mommy.

Firstly though, I must state that I did not have a traumatic birth/delivery with my little one. There was pain involved and I definitely cried and screamed at times, but on the inside I was literally beaming with excitement and joy to finally get to meet my baby! Also, I never suffered from any postpartum depression, in fact I kind of had the opposite; I had a postpartum slap happy high that honestly lasted months and months, gradually fading out unnoticeably over time. Another thing - I didn't really require any physical recovery from childbirth.

Anyways, now that you all hate me - here are 9 things that helped me survive the newborn stage as a first-time Mommy:

1. I never read any books, went to any classes, nor listened to the majority of other moms regarding anything birth and baby related. Reason being is that the major theme that would come out from these sources was that it was going to be HARD WORK AND LOTS OF IT! It was all just a super wet blanket I knew I had to steer clear of. Not to say that the whole birth thing and dealing with a newborn is all rainbows and butterflies... but it kind of is. You're having a baby/ have a baby! How freaking awesome is that! You get to be a Mommy! No one will ever need or want you more than this little creature, and you will never love anyone (other than your other kids to follow of course!) the way you get to love this sweet babe. They are yours and you are theirs. It's not spoken or written enough the abundance of overwhelming love that consumes you.

2. I didn't let anyone (other than my dear husband and I) clean my home - laundry, dishes, floors, etc. This one's probably just specific to me. I get so stressed when others clean my house, and stress was the last thing I needed/wanted having a newborn to tend to. I could deal with living in the mess because I knew it was temporary and it was not on my list of priorities for this certain duration. What I really wanted/needed the most from others was just the doting on my little one; holding her and telling me how beautiful and wonderful she was. Thankfully, my life is full of the most wonderful family and friends, so this was greatly accomplished. Also, I got 2 or 3 meals given to us and it was just so nice to be nourished without all the effort we'd have to put into it before hand.

3. I only read/watched/played on a screen when there was literally nothing else I could do. Which means only when she was eating (which ya was a lot). It gave me permission to waste that time on entertainment, but also the freedom of not getting addicted to it. It was shut off the minute she was done and then I could finally spend that time snuggling, staring, talking, making faces, and listening to her sweet self.

4. I didn't take that many photos or videos of her. Rest assured I did take plenty, but there were days even weeks (gasp!) when I never pulled out that camera. I just wanted to be a part of all those moments and enjoy them without the camera-grabbing stress. There will be plenty of photos for her to have and look through when she's older, but a million of her at the newborn stage to me was just a needless task.

5. I prioritized. Food and sleep was all I needed. Of course her needs came before mine, and there were plenty, but when I got those moments when she was with my husband or sleeping I always chose my 2 basic needs always. I'd quickly down on some cupboard munch or leftovers and jump into bed!

6. I had many write-off days. Phone's were on silent, doors were locked and I shut myself in: No showers, no getting dressed, no cleaning, no cooking, no hair done, no make-up, no leaving the house, and no people. Days like that may sound awful to others, but I really truly just loved them. I gave my newborn all she would need and we would grab those zzz's as much as we could. No worrying about anything or anyone else, just us :)

7. I married a real good man. This action was made long ago, but it has paid off times a million; Most especially when you have a baby with him! He picked up where I lacked, he loved that little girl and her momma like crazy, and did anything and everything he could for us. He helped even more than I ever expected or anticipated. I highly recommend it to everyone when going through the newborn stages as a Mommy!

8. I knew that this time was fleeting. Any of the hard, any of the messy, any overwhelming stings of exhaustion were swallowed up entirely by just knowing that this wouldn't last long. She would grow up; she would no longer need me 24/7, she would no longer fit into my one arm, she would no longer make those baby sounds, she would no longer wake me up at all hours of the night, she would no longer have those itty bitty hands, those tiny feet, those perfectly little lips... one day she would no longer be this little baby of mine. Knowing this brought me wanting and soaking in every moment, and not only enjoying but deeply loving every aspect of it all, of her, and of me.


Lastly, but the most important:

9. I was grateful. I don't think anyone can fully comprehend what an amazing gift a child is, but I definitely had a knowledge of how very fortunate I was. Waking up from dreaming to a crying little one was just the pinch I needed to know this dream was real! I really do get to keep her! I have a baby! This gratitude left me with many overwhelming happy tears and made it a pure joy to be able to take care of this precious gift from heaven.

It's such a beautiful mess of a time that I am so blessed to be able to have had!



Heaven's slice is loving your newborn.

More like her

Once upon a time I was given an angel to keep forever. I had never fallen so deep in love so quick as I did for this sweet babe. This little angel required lot's of help from me in providing for her basic needs. And through all the momentous mess-filled memories and tender time-consuming thoughts, I can't help but so desire to just be more like her.



(My attempts to copy her)



Quick to forgive.

Amazed and overjoyed by what her body is and what it can do.

Not only willing, but wanting badly to help with anything and everything.

Able to find the joy in the menial tasks of the day like doing laundry, dishes, making the bed, sweeping etc.

Seeking and finding laughter every day in any way she can.

Smiling sporadically sometimes for no seemingly good reason at all.

Having a love for books.

Passing no judgment to others.





Possessing energy for days.

Having a true thirst for knowledge.

Holds no grudge.






Soaks in anything someone can teach her.

Finds pure glee in her voice.

Views most everything as a treasure just for her (especially anything on the ground).

Submissive to whatever I have planned for the day; Easily leaves her "workings" to follow me to any room I may go.













Showing others love without ever having to say the words.

Delighted in the morning she awakes to, having a deep excitement for each day that comes.

Oh to be her, finding love, joy, and fun in every part of the day. To love like she loves and give as she does I can only but try to be more like her.

Heaven's Slice is becoming like a little child.

Someday I won't have the time

Yes I may be tired.
Yes I may have fudgisicles unthawing in the car.
Yes I may have a dirty home that needs cleaning.
Yes I may have supper to get started.
Yes I may have other stores I wanted to hit up and look through.
...


But in this moment she is happy, and in this moment I'm the one that helped bring that smile on her face.

The truth is one day I might actually not have the time: I may have some sort of major deadline, someone else waiting for/needing me desperately, or declined health issues that place time limits.  But right now, I do have that time. I  have the time to play in the front yard of the clinic after our appointment. I have time to chase after her on the sidewalk as she goes as far away from where we parked as she desires. I have the time to let her walk down main street picking up and looking at every leaf and looking through every store window. I have the time to let her push the cart. I have the time to let her run down the isles. I have the time to let her touch every piece of clothing. I have the time to pick her up and show her what I'm doing in the kitchen. I have the time to have her put every single sock in the dryer. I have the time to let her help put away the dishes and "organize" the drawer with me. I have the time to read her the same book for the 10th time in a row. I have the time to play with her in the dirt that is our front lawn as the groceries lay sitting on the steps. I have the time to sing "sleeping bunnies" again and again for her. I have the time to let her 'refold' the clothes I just folded. I have the time to dance with her. I have the time to let her be...

It now takes me 3x longer to get anything done, but that's just 3x times longer I get to spend invested in this day we have together.

She may not remember all the fun she just had an hour ago or even 5 minutes ago. She may not be old enough to keep this moment as a tender memory to look back at. She may not realize the sacrifices I made so she could have the extra time having fun at a playground.  She may not know that her desires were met because of her Mommy's choices. She may not understand that this is her childhood I am helping build. But in this moment she is happy, and in this moment I am too.

A wise Walmart greeter once told me after coming up to my little one and making smiles at her,

 "If you don't have time for a little child then you don't have time for anything."

Heaven's slice is making time for a child.