Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Things I NEVER thought I'd say

Here's 5 funny things I never thought I'd say this past year:
  1. That's a huge booger, please let me pick it! I can't explain why, but I now take thorough enjoyment picking another person's nose. I anxiously plot my next attack once I encounter an unsuccessful retrieval. Sometimes a lot of my day's thought process revolves around these attacks, as you may already know, babies can be quite uncooperative.
  2. I miss my job. This probably isn't what you'd think. You see, I had easy access to surgical gloves there. Ok that probably still doesn't make sense, let my further explain - I HATE the feeling of pulp and orange juice on my fingers, but I LOVE oranges. Brilliantly, I came up with peeling and eating oranges with surgical gloves on a couple years ago while at work. Whilst peeling an orange today I found myself actually spitting out these words. Pretty sure once I purchase a box of gloves though, this statement won't fall out of my mouth again.
  3. I can see why people nurse way further into a baby's life. I truly didn't think I'd say this, but after my first encounters of feeding my baby solids, it spilled out. Um, yeah, it's sooooooooooooo messy, my goodness is it messy, like, wow, and time consuming. Nursing is way quicker, easier and mess free. Granted my daughter's much better at it now and I'm more used to the messes. It was just the initial shock of food literally everywhere that I was so surprised over. (please no one take offence to this one. I don't care if you never nursed or nursed till they were way older, we're on the same team and that's your personal decision. Chances are, you're a terrific mother)
  4. Dang I'm hot. (as in my generation's word for physical attractiveness) I'll admit, I say this a lot  more often to myself than the average woman (high five for positive self talk!). But, I never thought I'd say this and really mean it as much as I did when I was pregnant. Honestly, clothes hugged my belly just perfectly, I looked fantastic in tight skinny pants, I just felt all around gorgeous. Of course other people's comments of how huge or big I was getting did pop my bubble, but once I was out of their presence I was back to feeling my super hot self. It could have been the hormones giving me this wonderful clouded mind's view, or it could have been that I was just so grateful and excited to have a pregnant belly that I actually saw it's true glorious beauty. Either way, pregnancy looked pretty good on me.
  5. I'm hot. (as in the super warm kind) I used to be the girl sneakily turning up the furnace at church; people did NOT appreciate that let me tell you. I used to be the girl who had to carry a jacket in the summer because chances are I'd have to step into an alaskan iceberg of a store or home at some point. I used to be the girl who refused to jump in the water because my body would go into shock. I used to uncontrollably shiver so bad when drinking a slurpie that it looked like I was having a seizure (which can I say was so worth it, even though super embarrassing when someone saw me and called 9-1-1 because they were worried - Not a true story). I was the girl that LOVED the feeling of sitting in a car that had been basking in the sun all day. But after having a baby my body temperature got warmer, and warmer, and warmer and now I'm hot.


Heaven's slice is: successful booger-picking, not having pulp sticky fingers, a baby's messy face, pregnant bellies, and warm bodies to jump into cold lakes with.


2 comments:

Whitney said...

lol, I can completely relate to pretty much everything you said here...accept the feeling hot while pregnant, I felt like a whale.

Unknown said...

Nice! And I'm sure you looked dang hot even if you didn't feel it ;)