Thursday, February 13, 2014

A mother's decision

This past week I had to make a decision that all working mothers have to make once they have a child and their maternity leave is up... do I go back to work? This post is a personal one, and one in where I will repeat again is a personal one. Every mother has to make this decision herself with regards to her own circumstances and special situations. This is not a debating matter of right or wrong; it is a personal matter within yourself, your family and the lord. Through gaining divine inspiration over what your particular decision should be and you choosing to act is what makes it right or wrong. Outside judgements cannot hold, as only a mother knows her circumstances and her relationship with the lord is a sacred one.

For me, it was wrong choice to go back to work full-time. I've read a lot of talks and scriptures on the topic within my religious beliefs and the answer became very clear to me. My divine nature and purpose is to be a mother - a nurturer. Having a little one specifically placed in my charge is one of the greatest miracles and blessings I've ever received. I feel therefore, that my time and attention should be towards my daughter and husband and not towards an outside career. We have sufficient for our needs as a family, so I find no reason why our family needs the extra pay cheque at this time.

Hard times may come into play in the future with our finances, but right now we are stable. I've found it easy to live a frugal lifestyle as I've never really known any different, so this will be a great preparation for when times are tough and cuts in budgets need to be made. With me staying in my job as casual I'm free to say yes and no to as many or as little shifts as suits my family. It will also keep me as an internal employee with my employer, so if I need to go back to work financially I'll be able to apply for jobs within the corporation with more sway for them to hire me. Staying casual will also keep the knowledge and skills in my field of work up to date, so if I have to re-enter into the workforce more fully, it will be a smoother transition.

This answer to stay home with my little kidlet was not only a logical one for our circumstances, but also a divinely inspired heartfelt reassurance of peace. This past year (she was born about a year ago) has been the best year of my life. I have had many happy joyous moments in my years past, but this year was different. I have never been so consistently happy day in and day out. It's like there was never a bad day, only a bad hour or three, then it was good again. The reason for my magical transformation of happiness? - I found my purpose. Yes, my little girl's face brings immense joy, gratitude, and love to my heart, but she was merely the humble messenger; it goes much deeper than that. It goes back to Heavenly Father and the great plan of salvation; it goes back to the pre-existence before I entered into this world. I was female then just as I entered this world as such. With this gender specific powers, traits, and responsibilities were placed upon me. I always knew that this was, but I didn't fully understand what it meant for me. The birth of our little one has forced me to take care of someone else's every need 24 hours a day 7 days a week. You'd think that this would exhaust me, that it would drain me, but it did not. Though my body at times grew weary, my spirit became refreshed and invigorated beyond delight. I was able to forgive easier, think of others more often, and be kinder to those around me. I felt a jump start to a new life, striving joyously to change my behaviours to better reflect the love of my heavenly father.

To be a mother, a nurturer, a woman is all in the same and it is a glorious holy calling entrusted upon the female gender. It is a power of love, care, and empathy that breaks all bounds and brings us closer to our Saviour. How I wish this knowledge became clearer to me earlier in life, but it did not. A tiny messenger however, brought this knowledge swiftly to my attention, and I will never be the same.

Heaven's slice is knowing your divine role.


Anonymous said...

LOVED this post. You are such a sweet mother!!

Julie J said...

Awe thanks Sara!